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Submitted by Rob Richards on Wed, 08/02/2006 - 9:27pm.
I had an experience today that was highly stressful. It affected the rest of my day and I am still affected by it now. I got into an argument with someone over something that we shouldn't have ever gotten to the point of shouting about. After the shouting was over, we talked and were able to really communicate our needs and desires. I left the conversation feeling really good, but the stress of the first half has stuck with me all day.

This really solidified for me the importance of communication. Had I and the other party had meaningful conversations about things at a regular interval, we never would have gotten to the point we were at. I bring this up because I think most of the problems we have in the world are due primarily to a lack of real conversation. It is so easy to become insular to other points of view. Too often, we entrench ourselves and at the slightest sign of contention, we explode upon one another. This manifests itself in violence, shouting, anger, passive aggressive manipulation, and so on. My point is that we need to stop and breathe, and then really talk about things. There are tough issues that we have to deal with, but if we establish a frequent and open dialogue, there are no limits to what amazing things we can accomplish together. OlyBlog is the seed of that, let's keep it going. Let's welcome dissent, let's not get in the way of progress. True progress involves us all.

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Don't let vocals fade passions...

spoken speech occasionally sparks nerves....
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Too often agreement is

Too often agreement is mistaken for understanding. It seems seeking to understand is the first order of business in dialogue. One can understand without agreeing. In order to understand, one must "stand under" rather than over. There is too much standing over in dialogue, puffing up of chests etc. Or there is the tendency to plop some platitude or axiom right down in the middle of a conversation as if that makes it all summed up now. I notice here at olyblog there are a few who think just cause they put quotation marks around a sentence it carries more weight and truth. I think we've become accustomed to seeking a one liner like a home run, rather than building toward understanding that is complex. It seems to me the platitude panderers are more interested in ending a conversation, more interested in standing over than understanding.
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Seeking the under

I've found that it really makes a difference to admit confusion, difficulty, etc. Baring of wounds, when not used manipulatively, can have a profoundly humanizing effect on a conversation. One certain symptom of chest-puffing is an unwillingness to admit doubt, error and fallibility. When I am vulnerable, it creates an opportunity for me to learn, to connect with and to be understood; it also creates an opportunity for others to be vulnerable. We're all just a bunch of squishy love-balls with brain farts and egos. When we admit that, we have a chance at understanding each other.
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