12 mini-reviews for the short attention span, taken from dark corners of stevenl's video vault:

Blackmail / directed by Alfred Hitchcock (1929, DVD). Anny Ondra, John Longden, Donald Calthrop, Cyril Ritchard. A fascinating cusp film on many levels. First, it is sort of a hybrid between the silent and sound eras in motion pictures. Second, it was released in early Oct. 1929. By the end of the month the Great Depression was underway, making this movie a last gasp of the Jazz Age before we entered harsh reality. And finally, Hitchcock's quick artistic use of the new audio technology really establishes him as a film genius. Apparently Hitch had already filmed a portion of this story before the new sound technology became available to him. So he backtracked and either dubbed in the sound or reshot. His main actress had a thick continental accent, so he had another actress speak into the microphone while the onscreen character mouthed the words. It all works, in sort of a surreal, Dadaist way. Like I said, the guy was a genius. And this is credited as Britain's first talkie. He had an immediate grasp of this new audio technology and knew how to exploit it. We experience the senses of a murderess as she hears a third-hand account of her deed and only hears the word "Knife" in the chatter. We hear a bird chirping in an annoying way during a key scene (what is it with Hitch and birds, anyway?). This has the usual Hitchcock voyeurism and low opinion of human nature-- in this regard he was way ahead of his time. Anny Ondra is still in silent film mode as she acts the part of a woman who is bored with her workaholic Scotland Yard boyfriend and then inadvertently murders a slimeball she had been flirting with. Using classic silent film overstatement with off-camera speaking is unique to this movie, I suspect. And quite odd, yet engaging. Fellow Boomers will enjoy seeing a young Cyril Ritchard, who we all knew as Capt. Hook in the Mary Martin version of Peter Pan. I would say this movie is a must-see for any student of film history. Plus, it is just good entertainment. Not too shabby for being almost eight decades old.

Bulworth / directed by Warren Beatty (1998, VHS). Warren Beatty, Sean Astin, Christine Baranski, Halle Berry, Don Cheadle, Nora Dunn, Larry King, Oliver Platt, Jack Warden, William Baldwin (uncredited), George Hamilton (uncredited). A very half-baked film. The premise: In 1996 during the primary season, a veteran liberal Democratic Party U.S. Senator from California feels he has sold out to the new "Contract on America" reality and arranges to have himself offed by a hitman as a form of penance, or suicide. It is never really explained. In the meantime he ventures into his campaign without the restraints of social or political checks and says what he really thinks, or at least he does in the early part of the story. By the end he is merely repeating what he has been told by others (albeit the voiceless disenfranchised), without the use of critical thinking. I'll start by what I didn't like: I did not like Beatty's appropriation of rap culture. Seeing a 60-year old (which means he's now 70, yow! I can remember when he was on Dobie Gillis!) rich white guy attempting to perform rap type music and lyrics really makes me feel uncomfortable. Plus, his rap wasn't that good. Here's what I liked: The Angel of Death character shadowing him was not a gun-toting assassin, but a camera-carrying stalkarazzi. Nice plot device, and a character assassin if not a real one. I really enjoyed it when Bulworth talked to the press drawing from his own experience. Beatty got extremely provocative here and I found myself, even a decade after he made this, still cheering him on for the truths he was telling ("Yeah, yeah / You can call it single-payer or Canadian way / Only socialized medicine will ever save the day! Come on now, lemme hear that dirty word - SOCIALISM!"). The character of Bulworth may have been an idealist in the past, as evidenced by his office photos alongside RFK, but by 1996 he is an empty person. And we never know who he really is other than a half-mad cipher. I can't think of a real-life parallel in recent history, although Vice-President Rockefeller got a little odd 1974-1977. Eugene McCarthy went way out there in the 1970s as an independent, but he was more articulate and subdued than Bulworth. The Dems keeping Gene off the NY ballot in 1976 handed the election to Carter. And Mike Gravel is not exactly screwed on too tight, but I enjoy his frankness. I'm digressing as usual. Bulworth is a fun film for political junkies, no matter what the party affiliation.

"The Face of Evil" (Doctor Who) / directed by Pennant Roberts (1977, VHS off-air). Tom Baker, Louise Jameson, Leslie Schofield. The Doctor does battle with a deranged computer. This is the episode featuring the debut of regular companion Louise Jameson in the role of Leela, a warrior savage who wears a skimpy leather outfit. Apparently the producers thought the show needed some more sex appeal. This program has a theme of critical thinking in the face of fundamentalism. Although the Doctor can be a bit preachy himself at times, he does have a couple quotes in this one I really liked: "Never be certain of anything. That's a sign of weakness," and, "The very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common. They don't alter their views to fit the facts. They alter the facts to fit their views." Ahh, so many people who are wrong on the Internet. So little time. Tom Baker seems to be totally at ease as the Doctor and in this story you can easily see how he managed to charm his way into being the most popular of all the actors who portrayed the Time Lord. By the way, I once had a car that sounded just like the TARDIS when it started up.

"A Touch of Class" (Fawlty Towers) / directed by John Howard Davies (1975, VHS). John Cleese, Prunella Scales, Connie Booth, Andrew Sachs, Michael Gwynn, Robin Ellis. "A gin and orange, a lemon squash, and a scotch and water PLEASE!" The premier episode of this excellent series. It doesn't have the feel of being a pilot or an introduction as the characters establish their identities very quickly. Aside from the Major being a bit more on the ball than subsequent shows, the roles were pretty consistent throughout the dozen stories. In this tale, Basil's snobbery gets the better of him when a con artist posing as an English lord sees an easy mark. The tall Cleese is able to bend and twist and actually make himself smaller than the lord he is busy trying to impress. There is a great moment of comic timing when Basil realizes he's been had. We actually feel a small measure of remorse for him, which is saying a lot since he's such a dreadful man. Notice at the opening credits during the long shot of the hotel itself, there is a cacophony of caws from a murder of crows to set the tone. One of Michael Gwynn's final appearances on camera, he died the following year.

Hoffa / directed by Danny DeVito (1992, VHS). Jack Nicholson, Danny DeVito, Armand Assante, J.T. Walsh, John C. Reilly, Frank Whaley, Kevin Anderson, Tim Burton (uncredited), Bruno Kirby (uncredited). Jimmy Hoffa: working class hero or thuggish demagogue? The story of labor leader and anti-hero Jimmy Hoffa as told through a series of flashbacks in the heads of James R. and his sidekick as they unknowingly wait to be assassinated at a remote diner. Much like the subject of the appropriately named James Riddle Hoffa himself, this film generates mixed feelings. Hoffa's cause, which was noble, involved getting his hands not only bloody as he fought in literal class warfare alongside the working men in this economic struggle, but also dirty as he found himself having to partner up with some unsavory characters in his political journey, including the Mob and Richard Nixon. He was one of those larger than life public figures for us Boomers and his disappearance only added to the legend. Nicholson was both nominated for Best Actor (Golden Globe) and Worst Actor (Razzie) for the same role! Here's my take on that: He wasn't playing Jack Nicholson, he was actually acting. Viewers expecting to see a Jack Nicholson movie will be disappointed, and I suspect the Razzie nomination was a way of punishing him for breaking type. Personally, I enjoyed his portrayal of Hoffa. He really captured an individual who was single-minded and driven-- leaving it to the audience to decide what motivated the labor leader. Director Devito employs some original visual tricks during timelapse and flashback transitions. The hunting trip scene is a priceless gem of a scenario of workaholics who can't let it go. Although I do not give this movie high marks for historical accuracy, the dialogue from the RFK/Hoffa exchange at the Senate hearings is apparently verbatim, and very well played. The film is a bit too long and could've been trimmed down in places. Tim Burton is supposedly one of the corpses in a funeral setting. The Nicholson/DeVito chemistry is surprisingly effective. My favorite line takes place while Hoffa and his Watson, Bobby, are handcuffed and being driven to prison: Bobby: "I can't even scratch myself" Hoffa: "Do you itch?" Bobby: "No." Hoffa: "Then what the f*** are you complaining for?"

Kids in the Hall. Season 1, episode 7 (1989, DVD). Dave Foley, Kevin McDonald, Bruce McCulloch, Mark McKinney, Scott Thompson, Nicole de Boer. Hotel La Rut, Plummet, First Poem, Fletcher Christian, Joymakers. By their 7th show they are settling into a formula where there will be a running skit throughout the program (in this case, "Hotel La Rut"). "First Poem" gives us an early look at McCulloch's teenage rocker character and his girlfriend, Laura-- one of my favorites in their impressive parade of personalities. Foley has a good monologue about Fletcher Christian-- the shoe salesman. I think they were reaching a bit to fill time in episode 7. It lacks the punch of the earlier shows.

"The Dancing Men" (The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes) / directed by John Bruce (1984, DVD). Jeremy Brett, David Burke, Tenniel Evans, Betsy Brantley, David Ross, Eugene Lipinsky. "I'll order Jeremy Brett with extra ham, please." This was Brett's second time on screen as Holmes, so he is still very "on." Compared to other episodes in the series, this one seems edgier, the people are rude and stressed out. The circumstances of the story are harsh and tragic. We see a Chicago gangster and how foreign that must seem to the English. We see the classic detective interviewing the gathering of servants scene. And we enjoy watching the local cop admiring Holmes' methods of detection, muttering "Wonderful" as he scribbles field notes. Holmes' parlor tricks of observation in a casual way appeared to have taken more work than the big case here, as most viewers will not have trouble being a step ahead in solving the so-called mystery. But, in spite of the simple script and the generally sad theme of this tale, Brett is well worth watching. As always, very impressive production values. Some BBC trivia: David Ross, who played Inspector Martin, later portrayed the first Kryten in Red Dwarf and was also the voice of the Talkie Toaster. I bet that was information you were dying to know.

Vengeance Valley / directed by Richard Thorpe (1951, VHS). Burt Lancaster, Robert Walker, Joanne Dru, Sally Forrest, John Ireland, Carleton Carpenter, Hugh O'Brian, Ray Collins, Harvey B. Dunn (uncredited). Actually this should be entitled, Denial River Valley, as a family of classic enablers pay the price for years of sweeping everything under the rug. Before the days of DNA testing, the question of paternity when a single frontier woman gives birth to a son brings everything to a head. Set against the backdrop of a cattle ranch, the film starts slow and just as I was about to give up on it, the pace quickened. What kept me hooked was Robert Walker's portrayal of the sociopathic weasel brother, his Cain to Lancaster's Abel. His character is fixed, he never changes. We keep waiting for his moral struggle to begin, but it doesn't happen. Instead, those around him must adapt. The direction on this was awful. The color was flat, beautiful vistas gone to waste, the ending was abrupt, and the music was typical oater fare. The story and actors deserved better. Ed Woodians will enjoy looking for Harvey B. Dunn.

Sea Turtles: Ancient Nomads / directed by Robert Nixon (1988, VHS off-air). A documentary courtesy of the National Audubon Society. Actually, the tape is incomplete, so I only a saw a portion of this. Nice cinematography. Back in the JFK era little pet turtles were all the rage. Mine lived in a plastic bowl that included a tiny fake palm tree. None of our turtles lived very long. They were eventually banned from pet shops due to salmonella outbreaks. The turtles in this documentary are much larger. Did you known that back when South Puget Sound Community College was still known as Olympia Vocational Technical Institute their mascot was a turtle? Hey, I hijacked my own review! Not real helpful, am I?

"Michael Ellis" (Monty Python's Flying Circus ; v. 19, episode 41) / directed by Ian MacNaughton (1974, VHS). Graham Chapman, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, Michael Palin. One of my favorite Python episodes, this one is a real narrative from start to finish. Packed with wonderful surreal visual jokes as little asides, the Michael Ellis saga is worthy of repeated viewings. Apparently the script came from discarded scenes originally meant for Monty Python and the Holy Grail, which means that even though John Cleese was no longer present as a cast member, his writing was still contributing to this one. If anyone doubts my assertion that Graham Chapman was probably the silliest person who ever graced the screen, simply watch this installment. Lots of terrific characters here. I particularly enjoyed Palin as Queen Victoria. The lack of Gilliam animations in this tale is made up for by Gilliam himself appearing with more frequency.

Little Swee'pea / directed by Dave Fleischer (1936, DVD). Voices by Jack Mercer, Mae Questel (both uncredited). A short black and white Popeye cartoon. Popeye has his hands full trying to keep tabs on the wandering Swee'pea while visiting the zoo. In the process he tangles with an elephant, hippo, leopard and, yes, a caiman. I would suggest all OlyBloggers study the caiman interaction very carefully and take notes. Very nice blending of the visuals with the music. Quality background graphic work too. This is one black and white film I wouldn't mind seeing colorized. Popeye has a nice little song at the end after spending a day with Swee'pea, "There's no ifs or maybes, I'll never have babies, I'm Popeye the Sailor Man."

"Red Dwarf A-Z" (Red Dwarf ; series VII, byte 3) / directed by Ed Bye (1998, VHS). Chris Barrie, Craig Charles, Danny John-Jules, Robert Llewellen, Chloë Annett, Norman Lovett, Patrick Stewart, Stephen Hawking, Hattie Hayridge, David Ross (voice), Brian Cox. A Red Dwarf 10th anniversary video Festschrift using the alphabet to highlight certain aspects of the program. Includes film clips and interviews. This is followed by a series of numerous "smeg ups," or outtakes-- although they appear to be sort of tacked on as an extra. This won't really help the uninitiated understand the premise of Red Dwarf. For that, you really need to see the first episode. Then all will fall into place. For the rest of us, this is a fun portrait. Includes testimonials from Patrick Stewart, Stephen Hawking, and a couple Daleks. I always loved that scene with Ace Rimmer sky surfing on a caiman and defeating the Nazis. What a guy!