12 mini-reviews for the short attention span, taken from dark corners of stevenl's video vault:

The Fatal Glass of Beer (W.C. Fields, World's Funniest Man) / directed by Clyde Bruckman (1933, VHS). W.C. Fields, Rosemary Theby, George Chandler, Richard Cramer. One of Fields' best. Filmed during the same year the repeal of Prohibition came into effect, Fields seems to look backward and razz his oversized nose at the world of the silent film melodrama and anti-saloon activists. All performed with a deadly and effective straight delivery. Set in the Yukon, one running joke has Fields opening the cabin door and declaring, "It ain't a fit night out for man nor beast" only to have some off-camera stagehand obviously throw fake snow in his face. This happens several times, and at one point W.C. makes an aside, "Tastes more like Corn Flakes," which is what it apparently really was. There is a good sight gag with a dachshund on a dog sled. The whole thing has sort of a mean-spirited and modern feel to it. It's also pretty funny. In a tale a great one-liners, my favorite one was: "I think I'll go out and milk the elk." Ironically, director Bruckman's alcoholism was already spinning out of control when this short was made.

Caccia alla volpe = After the Fox / directed by Vittorio De Sica (1966, DVD). Peter Sellers, Victor Mature, Britt Ekland, Martin Balsam, Akim Tamiroff, Vittorio De Sica. This work is so 1966: Neil Simon wrote it, De Sica directed, Burt Bacharach's music is spread all over the place, Britt Ekland has 1966 lips and hair, the color is mid-60s Technicolor, it was filmed in two languages, it has a big car chase scene with humorous music and lots of yelling, and Peter Sellers was at the peak of his career and clearly enjoying himself. Sellers plays a master con artist known as "The Fox" who manages to hoodwink an entire Italian village, including the Mayor and Police Chief, into helping unload and smuggle tons of stolen gold under the premise of shooting a movie. Posing as a film director, The Fox manages to exploit various ego-weaknesses for his ends. Perhaps it is due to De Sica intending this picture for two very different cultural audiences, Italian and American, but the timing of the humor is uneven. Sellers himself is never boring, however. During his brief stints in prison he reads Stanislavsky. And when he escapes and walks out a free man, which is whenever he feels like it, his schemes require him to assume different identities, and this is where we enjoy his parade of characters. I particularly like his portrayal of an American tourist in Italy. Victor Mature as the aging matinee idol and Martin Balsam as his nerve-wracked manager give us a subplot that provides a quirky and comedic foil for Sellers. Who knew Mature could be a comedian? He's great in this playing himself and I suspect it took some courage to assume this role. De Sica's visual composition is of higher quality than we are used to in a Sellers film. Vittorio briefly appears in the story as himself directing a film about Moses and barks out to the crew, "I want more sand in the desert!" The scene that sticks in my mind the most is when Sellers the faux director is directing the village to unload the gold, and they are singing happily and obliviously away as they pass the gold bars into a waiting truck while unknowingly performing a major crime. Made me think of some politicians and the voters.

Brazil / directed by Terry Gilliam (1985, VHS). Jonathan Pryce, Robert De Niro, Katherine Helmond, Ian Holm, Bob Hoskins, Michael Palin, Ian Richardson, Peter Vaughn, Kim Greist, Jim Broadbent, Barbara Hicks, Charles McKeown, Jack Purvis, Terry Gilliam (uncredited). I first saw this right after it hit videocassette status up close on a big screen TV in the home of a buddy in Coupeville, Wash. and it blew me away. Then, right after 9/11, I made a point to see this film again since I knew it was a preview of things to come. This is Terry Gilliam's prophetic view of the future through a Walter Mitty character operating in an Orwellian universe demonstrating the folly of being a Romantic in a Neo-Con world. In this film, society is run by a huge, faceless, and incompetent bureaucracy. The class division is ever widening. Although there is some new technology, the infrastructure is decaying. Security checks are everywhere. Information management has become a powerful tool as agents of the Ministry of Information use their flat screen monitors to seek out enemies of the State. Terrorist attacks by unnamed bombers for a cause that is unstated are so commonplace that bystanders barely notice. Public signs have declarations such as: "Suspicion Breeds Confidence" and "Who Can You Trust?" Torture is sanctioned as a necessary part of Homeland Security. Civil rights do not exist. The environment has been shot to Hell by industry and pollution. It is world that is more recognizable today than when it was originally made in 1985, meaning Gilliam accurately predicted the logical consequence of Reaganism. This is a rich movie, meriting repeated viewings. Gilliam, like Fellini, started out as a cartoonist and morphed into an incredible film director with a very distinct and original visual sense. You can tell a Gilliam piece of work just by looking at it. Great soundtrack utilizing variant strains of the title song. Good cast with the exception of Kim Greist, who didn't seem too comfortable in her role. Palin is menacing in a frighteningly friendly way. The protagonist, played by Pryce, spends so much time living in his head that we never really know when reality ends and fantasy begins within the framework of the story-- part of the genius of writers Gilliam, Tom Stoppard, and Charles McKeown. Pryce's character is also a bit pathetic, and although the story is horrific, I always find myself having more of an intellectual rather than emotional response once the credits start rolling. Perhaps this is due to the fact this movie is more about a system than it is about people. A film that needs to be rediscovered by every generation.

"Planet of Evil" (Doctor Who) / directed by David Maloney (1975, VHS off-air). Tom Baker, Elisabeth Sladen, Frederick Jaeger, Ewen Solon, Prentis Hancock, Louis Mahoney. Cheap sets! Overacting! Cheesy costumes! Crappy dialogue! Melodramatic music! And yet it is sort of fun to watch up to a point since it does get old fast. Tom Baker as the Doctor/Time Lord is a combination of Sherlock Holmes, Harpo Marx, and Bugs Bunny. And he likes to quote Shakespeare, who he knew personally. His hamlike acting seems more spontaneous than Jeremy Brett as Holmes, but no less overdone and fun. His companion, played by Sladen, has all the fashion choices throughout time, and yet actually chooses to dress and wear her hair in the style popular in 1975. Tragic. The over the top acting in general by the entire cast is just a given but I would like to single out Ewen Solon for really giving his role a try and making an attempt to take his part seriously. Fawlty Towers fans might enjoy seeing Louis Mahoney (he played a physician in "The Germans") in a brief role here. The plot is one that should seem familiar to regular viewers of this series. The Doctor and his companion land in the middle of a bunch of xenophobes who assume he is out to get them. Take this exchange as an example: Fear-Based Military Guy: "A full and immediate confession would save you great discomfort." Doctor: "Discomfort? You mean you're going to torture me?" Fear-Based Military Guy: "Interrogate you." Probably a good thing for the Doctor he has not landed in the United States post-9/11.

"The Kipper and the Corpse" (Fawlty Towers) / directed by Bob Spiers (1979, VHS). John Cleese, Prunella Scales, Connie Booth, Andrew Sachs, Geoffrey Palmer, Derek Royle, Charles McKeown. An episode that is classic in exposing Basil's complete, total selfishness and inability to deal directly with anything unpleasant. A Fawlty Towers guest dies in his sleep, creating a situation that is morbidly humorous and hyperactive. It would be bad enough to spend your final evening on Earth in this hotel, but to have your very last personal intercommunication with the likes of Basil would be horrible. The corpse was played by Derek Royle, who Beatles fans might recognize as the tour bus guide on Magical Mystery Tour. Geoffrey Palmer has a nice supporting role as a medical man ("I'm a doctor and I want my sausages!"). My favorite part is when Basil is having difficulty with getting a point across to Manuel. "Manuel," he says, "Let me explain." This is followed by a single fingered eyepoke. Not quite as tight as others in this series, but it remains stronger than most other situation comedies.

High Noon / directed by Fred Zinnemann (1952, VHS). Gary Cooper, Grace Kelly, Thomas Mitchell, Lloyd Bridges, Katy Jurado, Otto Kruger, Lon Chaney Jr., Harry Morgan, Ian McDonald, Lee Van Cleef, Sheb Wooley, Robert J. Wilke, John Doucette (uncredited), Jack Elam (uncredited), Virginia Christine (uncredited). Opening with a wedding between a retiring town marshal and his Quaker wife, the hero of this tale discovers a criminal he had sent to prison is returning on the noon train to exact revenge. With a little over an hour to go after he gets the news, this story is told in real time, more or less. Except for the overuse of the term "You're a fool" by various characters, there isn't much about this film to be cranky about. This is as good as it gets for Western movies-- ever. The graphic arrangement of the dusty black and white shots alone make this worth watching. The lack of Technicolor is a good thing, giving the story a kind of tintype feel. Zinnemann knew exactly when to zoom in and when to use those expensive crane shots to show how alone and isolated the hero was. And he has a great way of using the camera to show us particular points of view from different characters. The timing is so taut and fluff free, you almost forget that most of the action in this tale is psychological. Example: forget the boring gunfighting action as Cooper stands in the road watching his new bride ride in a wagon alongside his former jilted lover as the two women leave town together just before the ex-convict and his gang arrive to make mincemeat out of him. Talk about pressure. Meanwhile, the rest of the citizens in town are hiding and cowering in fear, letting the Marshal face his almost certain death alone. I bet Albert Camus loved this movie. The soundtrack is mostly made up of Tex Ritter's singing and it fits. As for other audio effects, this is one case where the sound of a train whistle is not romantic. Clocks are the enemy as they ominously tick. Grace Kelly's clipped delivery and Cooper's wooden persona are easy to imitate, but they work in this universe. Cooper (a former cartoonist like Fellini and Gilliam who found other employment) won a well deserved Oscar for this role. Standout supporting actors were Lon Chaney Jr. as the worn out former marshal (something about Lon always makes me instantly like him) and a fresh faced Lloyd Bridges as the hot-headed deputy. There is also a small army of supporting folks who later became familiar faces in a zillion television programs for the following few decades. It was Van Cleef's debut. This film was politically charged during the Soviet style Right-wing orgy known as the McCarthy Era, and conservative extremists whined that the story was too whiney. Viewing this in the early 21st century, High Noon strikes me as a traditional conservative manifesto, the triumph of individualism. So I don't get it. (A man's got to do what a man's got to do. As we all know, human nature and collectivism do not mix. Quakers might call themselves pacifists, but when it comes down to it, they'll use a gun, you'll see). Meanwhile, John Wayne, who criticized this film louder than anyone, acted in and produced Angel and the Badman in 1947, a film that celebrates Quakerism, pacifism, collectivism, and throwing away your guns. Go figure. Maybe it was the few seconds of Cooper's star in the dirt, some of the best frames in Western movie history. If so, the conservatives of 1952 were really more isolated from human emotion than I thought, but I guess that's what it took to run a reign of terror like McCarthyism.

Kids in the Hall. Season 1, episode 4 (1989, DVD). Dave Foley, Kevin McDonald, Bruce McCulloch, Mark McKinney, Scott Thompson. Déjà vu, Asshole (very uncomfortably funny), The Daves I Know (Bruce McCulloch is a brilliant when it comes to humor and music), The Guy With a Good Attitude Toward Menstruation, Apology in the Rain, When Timmy Gets Transferred, Sick of the Swiss (one of my favorite KITH skits), Country Doctor "Is that pie I smell?" -- The Kids have started, much to their benefit, graduating to filmed bits. The timing and pacing is very good in this one, although "Apology in the Rain" and "When Timmy Gets Transferred" didn't work for me. But that's the danger of improv type humor and with this group the investment of time is worth the toleration of gags that didn't quite make it since most of their stuff is terrific. And even the weaker material is worth watching just to track their growth. The two oldest Kids turn 50 in 2009.

The Stranger / directed by Orson Welles (1946, DVD). Edward G. Robinson, Orson Welles, Loretta Young, Richard Long. This was Orson Welles' least favorite of his films, perhaps proving that creators are not really in any position to be the best judges of their efforts. I've seen other Welles' films far weaker than this one. Made right after WWII, Edward G. Robinson is an investigator for the Allied War Crimes Commission. An infamous Goddamn Nazi has escaped and is hiding in a small Connecticut town under a respectable cover, and Robinson must out him. As in Double Idemnity, Robinson plays a formidable character who is nearly as cold-blooded as the killers he hunts. As a hero figure he is an odd one. He is not a typical Hollywood pretty boy, nor does he have any sort of personal weakness to overcome in order to solve the case. There is no question he'll get his man. The suspense is in seeing how much damage the Goddamn Nazi will cause before he gets nailed. Welles seems to be playing on our paranoia about having the enemy operating in an underground way in our very midst. In 1946 it was Goddamn Nazis not quite giving up, but by the following year it would be the Stinking Commies. Loretta Young does an amazing job playing a first class enabler who deals with the shock of finding herself wed to a Goddamn Nazi (can you tell I'm enjoying using that term?). Even when he was thin, Welles was an enormous ham and he plays the Goddamn Nazi quite well. As a director, Welles is all about light. His use of shadows and focusing on hands or personal objects while the action is taking place off camera is very effective. The first time the screen is bathed in sunlight is after a long dark spell occupied by suspicious characters, then we are introduced to the normal American town, establishing the "good" world as opposed to the slimey and dark nether regions of the (all together now) Goddamn Nazis. Young's character even touches on the subject: "I never had a dream like that before, it frightened me ... The little man was walking all by himself across a deserted city square. Wherever he moved he threw a shadow. But when he moved away, Charles, the shadow stayed there behind him and spread out just like a carpet." Back in this pre-television era, this movie provided many war-numbed Americans with their first exposure to actual documentary film footage of what took place in Hitler's concentration camps-- perhaps making this the most frightening motion picture of 1946.

The Mystery of the Hooded Horseman / directed by Ray Taylor (1937, VHS). Tex Ritter, White Flash, Iris Meredith, Horace Murphy. This is what Western film fans call an "Oater." Like the Elvis movies of later years, the plot is very secondary to the fact this is a vehicle for Tex Ritter's music. And like Elvis, Tex was a better singer than he was an actor. A bad guy named "Blackie." A humorous sidekick named "Stubby." Last ... words ... uttering ... cryptic .. clues ... arrrrgh! "You're a stranger in these parts, ain'tcha?" Bar fight scene with the film speed increased (actually unintentionally very funny in a Three Stooges way). A horse named "White Flash." A surprise ending you can spot from the next county. There are two aspects of this movie that make it a little different. First, the gang of bad guys is a thinly disguised representation of the Ku Klux Klan-- with the the exception that when they remove their hoods the tops of their craniums are not pointed as they are in real life. Secondly, in one part of the story we are treated to an instrumental song by the Range Ramblers in their 4th and final screen appearance. These guys were good and provided the highlight of the whole film.

Mischief / directed by Mel Damski (1985, VHS off-air). Doug McKeon, Catherine Mary Stewart, Kelly Preston. A coming of age movie set in Ohio, 1956. That was the great era for automotive design. Lots of really nice restored motor vehicles in this one, works of art on wheels. The cars are the best part of this film. The rest of it is fluff that you have seen a million times elsewhere. To be fair, the version I have was edited for television, so take that under consideration. Unlike the automobiles, the characters themselves still looked and acted as if they were in the Big 80s and not the Fab 50s.

"A Book at Bedtime" (Monty Python's Flying Circus ; v. 18, episode 38) / directed by Ian MacNaughton (1973, VHS). Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Terry Gilliam, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, Michael Palin. A book at bedtime, Red Gauntlet by Sir Walter Scott, Kamikaze Highlanders, No time to lose, 2001 parody, Frontiers of medicine, Spot the looney, Dueling documentarians. Python very correctly continues the theme of penguins as objects of something sinister. This episode had more sophisticated interweaving and linkages of the sketches than usual. These are very silly people, with Chapmen being the silliest of them all.

Popeye the Sailor Meets Ali Baba's Forty Thieves / directed by Dave Fleischer (1937, DVD). Voices by Jack Mercer, Mae Questel, Gus Wickie (all uncredited). Another rare Technicolor Popeye cartoon from the 1930s. This one features all the regulars: Olive Oyl, Wimpy, and Brutus. That amazing fluid Fleischer style is put to good use, with beautifully rendered backgrounds and inanimate objects suddenly coming to life. This particular copy has a fuzzy and horrible audio, which seems a shame as there is plenty of music and muttered asides by Popeye that are missed.